


Lucifer Morningstar One Shots.

by UnderwaterNearHome



Series: Lucifer Side Stories [3]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: BAMF Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV), F/M, Female Reader, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV), Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) Devil Reveal, Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) Whump, Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) Wing Reveal, Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) is Bad at Feelings, M/M, One Shot, Protective Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV), Self-Harm, Smut, male reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-12
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-20 10:00:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30003144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnderwaterNearHome/pseuds/UnderwaterNearHome
Summary: Everything I have on Lucifer that isn't chapter'd in one PLACE.Some scenes are from my other works. This is them in one place.Enjoy, loves.WARNING: THESE CAN INCLUDE FROM A RANGE OF ANY TYPES OF NON CON TO UNDERAGE TO SELF HARM TO DEPRESSION TO MAJOR FLUFF AND ANGST.Be wary.
Relationships: Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV)/Reader
Series: Lucifer Side Stories [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2195931
Kudos: 9





	1. Composing

**Author's Note:**

> This is from a really long Lucifer Fic that I wrote.
> 
> 'Ice Sickles' You are in replace of Chloe in quite a few moments and therefore when time freezes in season 5- You are there instead of Chloe, and he isn't trying to say, 'I love you'.
> 
> Warning: Drinking, Piano.

He growled lowly as he threw back the burning drink and slammed the glass back down on the bar counter.

He grabs both the bottle and the glass again as he walks over to the piano. He promised himself he wouldn’t-

But the memory of the way your hands feel is coming back to him.

His fingers glide across the keys and he ponders which song he wants to play. Which song he wants to _feel._

He figures it will come to him when his fingers dip into an E minor. The dark haired man flutters his eyes closed when the sound fills the air. He let’s it seep into his skin and his shoulders _finally_ untense.

Lucifer’s expression is empty and his face looks a bit hollowed out as he pressed into another key,and then another. He isn’t playing any song he knows, he’s playing his own.

He’s swaying just slightly and he now feels a bit tired. His eyes are getting heavy but he lets go of the keys and pours himself another glass.

Throwing it down his throat again, just as he had done with the other as he presses in a few other keys again. He starts to hum a random tune to himself as he does so.

He’s _composing_.

The Devil hasn't done so since the 50’s. When he met that wonderful man down on the corner of the street.

He hums even louder to cover the thoughts as he is suddenly painstakingly aware that what he felt for that man has never compared to what he _feels_ for you. That man hadn’t even really knew he was the devil.

He stopped composing when he went back to hell way before the man had even passed. He didn’t care enough to find out what happened to him. The man had never interested him, he simply kept up with his appearances and could keep up enough with the devil’s sexual appetite to keep Lucifer fairly loyal to him.

Lucifer opens his eyes again to look outside as his fingers press into the keys and he tries to remember the order in which he’s pressing them so he could play the same tune again.

He tries not to let his thoughts drift as he starts the composition over- playing it from the beginning and watching his fingers as he listened to the notes.

_Dun dun doo dah dun dun doo._

He hummed as he did it, slightly swaying again.

_La da dun dah dah dun la doo._

He lets himself think the words, ‘Your eyes become just the deepest blue as tears decide to fall from you.’

He silently leans himself against the piano, feeling like he’s gonna pass out.

‘I wonder if you’d fall with me, if god had pushed us, what a dick he’d be.’ he laughs slightly and drunkenly as he closes his eyes again. Letting himself focus on where the keys were.

He leans back and tilts his head to the sky, exposing the adams apple in his throat as he kept his eyes closed.

_Le la dee, da, dah, dun la doo._

Lucifer opens his eyes again and looks down at the piano. He pulls away from the keys to pour himself another drink. This time he takes a gentle sip instead, cherishing the taste.

“Bastard’s probably back on his throne enjoying this, watching me.” Lucifer growls as he brings the drink back to his lips and takes a drawn out sip.

_Hope you’re having fun, Dad._


	2. Eternal Damnation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You finally ask Lucifer the question everyone asks when they finally find out he really is the devil.
> 
> His answer however, is much different than what you might have expected.
> 
> You're not sure how to feel or react.
> 
> _
> 
> A female reader was in mind but anyone can read.

Lucifer didn't need to breath, he simply needed to be. He had learned however, how to let the heaving in his chest seem natural.

You remember hearing him tell you that story when you had first found out. You remember all the questions you had asked. You also remembered all the questions you _didn't_ ask.

"Lucifer?" A small 'hmm' that flitted in his chest echoed your ear.

Your head rested against his chest, your hand placed over him, your fingertips ghosting over the sheets. You were pressed into his side, one of his arms under you, wrapped around and holding you, feeling the warmth as his finger left and traced little circles in your shoulder.

"I got a question." He didn't reply so you continued, "Am I going to hell?"

His finger stopped abruptly and you felt a shift in him, whether he tensed, or smiled, or relaxed, you couldn't tell.

The question almost everyone had asked him, every pour soul who was cursed in knowing who he was. They all asked.

He suppose's he knew it was going to come eventually. If he was a mere mortal he would want to know as well.

He doesn't lie. He would never lie, it would do no good.

You silently waited for him to tell you what he told every poor sod that had asked him, that he had no control over such, that only they themselves could know. You closed your eyes and let yourself listen to his breaths as you assumed the question was sinking in.

You knew that he had no control over your guilt, you knew he would break into hell to save your soul had he needed to. He knew he would pull you out of your hell loop, and you had refrained from asking such a question knowing these things. 

But now you had to wonder, as you lay in your underwear, cuddled up at the dark of night, moonlight through the large glass windows... _were you going to hell?_

"Yes."

You sat up, pulling away from him as if his very touch would scorch you.

" _What_?"

You sat at the end of the bed on your knees, looking at him, mouth agape. But he just kept looking at the ceiling.

"When I rebelled _everything_ and _everyone_ that dared to follow in my footsteps were treated like dirt." Tears started to well in your eyes as your mind echoed his words.

_'Yes'_

"Father threw anyone who dared a passing glance at me, he struck some of his most loyal in their very cores. The other angels _hated_ me." You looked upon him in utter disbelief as he continued. The tears now sliding down your cheek as you listened.

Why did he think you were going to hell? Did he really think that low of you? The stories you knew... The things MAZE ALONE has said.

You thought he would- he would protect you? You never had to ask, you just assumed he would be there for you. But now- _what_ is he even talking about?

"I fell, he cast me down and I opened my eyes, left to the darkness. Lilith's children followed days- but what felt like years in hell- later. And then the first souls flooded once Eve ate the apple. I gave them free will." His eyes never left the ceiling as he spoke.

"Lucifer-" 

"I ruled over hell, bouncing from loop to loop, watching and waiting. And then I came up, I had ruled hell for millenniums. I had popped up for the last time when Maze cut off my wings."

You wondered if you should just leave, put your clothes back on and walk out the door.

Did he really think you were that guilty? That you deserved hell? Would he laugh at you? Would he be slightly shocked if he showed up in it.

_Stabbing you in the back, just like it felt he was doing now._

"If I ever have to go back- and I will have to go back." His eyes finally flickered to you, and you could see, in the dark, the red glow of them.

"You will be coming with me." Your breath catches in your throat as he sat up, scooting closer to you and using the pads of his thumb to swipe away a tear.

"Hell is nothing to be afraid of _ever_." His eyes slowly faded back into the chocolate brown and you watched as the moonlight shaded the half of his face.

"And in it, If I ever go back, I will wait for you to get there, My Love." And you finally caught the glint in his eyes as he leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead.

You opened your mouth slightly and hiccuped, eyes never leaving his.

"Lucifer if you ever go back-" You pause, swallowing the lump in your throat as you commit every single feature on his face to memory, "-you wouldn't have to wait long."

A small irritated growl rested in his throat as he lowered his head and slowly stole a kiss.

He pulled away and murmured softly against your lips.

"I better have to wait _millions_ of years." His eyes flickered a red glow before he leaned down lower and kissed your jaw.

"If I see you any earlier-" He licked a stripe from your jaw to behind your ear, making you close your eyes.

"-I will fly up here and see to it that you survive." He scowled and let his hand come up to hold your throat as he whispered in your ear.

"And if you even _think_ about offing yourself for me again-" He nipped hard at your neck and your mouth fell open, leaning your head back to expose your neck.

"You will wish you had never been mine." You silently opened your hooded eyes and looked back down at him.

As if to say, ' _I could never wish for something so empty'_.

And you were quite right, a world without him simply _felt_ empty just thinking about.


	3. Let me go, Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Lucifer left for hell, it was hard to forget him.  
> So much so that he stayed with you in some ways.
> 
> As much as you know in your heart -in your very soul- that this is the very last thing he would have wanted. The very opposite of what the man you loved would have wanted- you just can't bare to let him go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :) 
> 
> Pretty sure it could be a female or male reader here.

_His arms are wrapped around your waist and he’s pulling you and pulling you and suddenly something else is pulling you._

_And now he’s on the balcony and he’s looking at you and his eyes are slightly teary but he won’t listen to you. He won’t let himself be for you. Won’t let himself live for you._

_You want to make him, to force him to, to be selfish. But you instead cry, and he watches you and you know it hurts him to watch you crumble to the floor because the only happiness you ever had is leaving you._

_You almost want to beg him to take you with him._

_You are just words from asking when he smiles sadly, a tear slipping down his tan skin and bursting at his stubble._

_“Everything I own is yours, my love.”_

_And his wings extend and you open your mouth to beg him to take you with him and he is gone._

…

It's morning, _another morning_.

At sometime the dreams of him will have to stop, at some point you will have to accept that he is gone.

But as the past year and a half will prove, they never seem to stop.

"Good morning, love."

And still, as you sit in bed, barely opening your eyes, you can hear his voice. His accent, the charm.

"Good morning, Luci." You mumble, rolling over and opening your eyes.

There he is, in his suit, legs crossed, just _WAITING_ for you.

"Another dream of me?" You close your eyes again and sit up, holding your face in your hands.

"You've got to stop, Darling."

_But the way the pet name rolls off of his tongue makes it so much harder to deny._

"Why did you leave me?"

"Love-"

"Luci." You whine, willing him to answer you.

He sighs and stands up from the chair across the room, stalking over and standing beside the bed, towering over you.

"I could never leave you, M'dear."

His voice sends a shiver up your spine and you stand up, making your way out of bed and towards the kitchen.

"Eat."

You sigh and lean against the counter of the penthouse, of LUX, and let your eyes glaze over as you look at the piano. Remembering how we used to play for you, how much emotion really existed in his eyes before he left.

_Before he left me._

“I wanted to go with you.”

Lucifer swallows the lump in his throat and leans against the wall, you can faintly hear your own heartbeat.

“You told me, love.”

“That’s the thing, if only I wasn’t stupid enough-”

“Hey! Don’t do that.” He growls fiercely.

You shake your head and let small tears slip down your cheeks as you open the fridge.

“You’ll be alright, Darling. Just eat, you haven’t eaten in two days.”

You’re a bone rack, skinny as a stick and you hate to eat. Lucifer used to cook these extravagant meals for you and take you places and since he's left you haven’t had much of an appetite.

His penthouse and money and LUX and the 14 other buildings he rented… he left it all to you, and now it’s as if you’ve failed him.

Maze and Amenadiel and Linda and surprisingly Chloe have been running all of it, while you live in the penthouse and never leave.

“How about we go down to the station today, Hun?” You shake your head, looking over at Lucifer.

“I think I just wanna hear you play me something.” The frown on his face deepens and it hurts him to look you in the eyes when you’re like this.

“Y/n, don’t let this be-”

“Luci, please.”

He stiffens before sighing as he walks over and sits at the piano. He waits for you as you open your phone and pull out the audio, pressing play.

Lucifer starts to press the keys as you listen to the audio.

Almost like he’s really playing it.

_But he isn’t._

“I love it when you play, Lucifer.” You say, smiling as you watch his fingers hit the keys, yet frowning when you see they don’t dip.

“I know you like to pretend I’m still with you, Love...but isn't this a bit much?” He shakes his head sadly and looks over at you as the tears slip down your cheeks.

It seemed like these days you were neverending sobbing.

The audio ends and it makes you all the more sad when Lucifer sits up and turns to you.

_I miss you._

A slight hitch in his breath when he sees your knees give in as you slide down the counter and let yourself heave.

“Please..” Lucifer says.

“Let me go, Love.”

_I can’t._

And by lunch time you’re finally in the elevator, heading down to LUX for a slight appearance.

You wave at Maze and Amenadiel and they wave back, pity in their eyes as you grab a shot of liquor off of the bar and down it in one gulp.

“Darling, you need to accept it.”

You smile and wave him off, looking over at Maze and Amenadiel who are still watching you.

“Lucifer talks waaaayyyy too much.” And you set the shot down and walk away.

And they watch you, exchanging worried glances.

You’ve been saying things like that for quite a while now.

_But Lucifer has been gone for a year, and he’s not coming back._


	4. Don't Get Cocky (S)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> S, means Smut, babes.
> 
> You're on a stake out and quite bored.
> 
> He sends you a sneaky picture to keep you company.
> 
> ;)
> 
> Warning: Sexting, Calling.

“Yes this is- okay.” You sighed a bit sadly as you ended the call and kept watching the warehouse. You had called to inform Espinoza that nothing had changed. Nothing had moved for almost 4 hours and you were growing a bit tired.

He had, however- insisted you get over your tiredness knowing you had a job to do. Sometimes you hated how low on the food chain you really were.

You were Decker’s lap dog. You pretty much tended to every job she didn’t want. You were her stand in, her stunt man. You were her shadow.

It annoyed you how Espinoza seemed to use you like his as well because he was demoted. You both had the same job but he- somehow -was above you.

You sat in the car having to pee hours ago. Man you sometimes wondered why you even kept the damn job.

Lucifer had enough money to keep both of you happy until the end of time (well, your time anyway) and has adamantly recommended you end your job. But you just  _ had  _ to be stubborn. And now you were sitting in your car watching an unmoving building.

_ Great. _

Your phone vibrated on the dashboard and you rolled your eyes as you clicked it open, glancing at the building as you opened the text.

**_Hello, Love._ **

You grinned to yourself and typed back quickly.

**_I’m sorry. I’m working late, Luce. I know we were supposed to get dinner but Espinoza sent me on another run._ **

**_And you listened to him? Let me swing by and drop you off some food, we can do it together?_ **

You frowned softly before scanning the area again. You really wanted to say yes, but you knew he wasn’t allowed in this case- and even then it’s not like you had much of a rank or respect.

**_You know you’re only allowed on Decker’s cases, Lucifer._ **

You hated how tempting and convincing he was, even when you couldn’t see him. You knew he was the Devil, but by god sometimes you saw why Eve ate the apple. What could god possibly have over him?

**_And? She doesn’t have to know, neither does Detective Douche. Our little secret?_ **

You had a lot of little secrets when it came to him, none of which were little, or did you any good. You glanced around again, still no movements anywhere. You were starting to think you were the victim of a false alarm.

**_I would if I could, I’m bored out of my mind._ **

A few seconds of silence passed by and you closed your phone, staring up at the warehouse. Still nothing. It’s been 4 hours and 15 minutes. You considered angrily calling Espinoza again, ordering him to let you leave. The shipment had left 2 hours ago and he still insisted you stay. You had plans. You had a life.

The vibration rattled in your lap and you opened it again, clicking on Lucifer’s name and-

_ Oh. _

It was a picture. His suit overcoat was off and he was just in his slacks, loafers and button up. It looked as if he had set the camera up and started a timer. And there he was, leant over, looking right into the camera, rolling up and unbuttoning his sleeves.

He was smirking with a flirty wink to the camera and it sent a shiver down your spine. It didn’t occur to you to reply for a few seconds.

**_I’m quite bored, myself._ **

Your face paled a bit as you forced yourself to look away and at the building. When you looked back down you bit your lip and replied.

**_That’s dangerous. The Devil being bored._ **

Instead of a reply in words- he sent another picture. In this one he was standing far away, the phone in the same position. The glass windows behind him as he stood away, his loafers and socks off and the first 3 buttons of his shirt undid.

He was grinning this time.

**_Then why don’t you excite me?_ **

A blush was spreading across your cheeks and he wasn’t even there. Your stomach flutters as you glance up at the non moving building.

You were gonna regret this-

**_How do I do that?_ **

Another picture came in. All the buttons were undid and his shirt was rumpled as it opened in the middle, exposing the lean and muscled looking stomach. He was smirking again.

**_I think you know, Love._ **

And fuck- you did know. But the building and the job and-

Another picture. The shirt completely discarded and his slacks unbuttoned, the top of his V line visible. He was slowly stripping away at his clothes with each picture and- oh god.

**_But I can’t._ **

**_You know how I love it when you break the rules._ **

A spark ignited in the bottom of your stomach and you slowly gulped, glancing at the building once again before slowly clicking on the camera and-

_ Here goes nothing. _

You pulled off your bullet proof vest and unbuttoned a few of your blue button up- police standard. Just enough to show the tip of the tank top you had underneath.

And you snapped the picture, letting out the breath you were holding as it sent.

**_Well hello, there. I knew you’d break the rules for me._ **

You didn’t get the chance to reply before another picture was sent.

His slacks were slightly lower on his hips, completely revealing the jut of his hips and the dip that lead down to-  _ that’s a nice picture. _

**_Try to catch up, Love._ **

You didn’t give it a seconds thought as you unbuttoned and slipped off the blue shirt and the tanktop. Unwrapping the wrap that held your boobs in place when you ran. You’re nippled were now exposed to the air and you hesitated before snapping a picture.

**_Is it cold or is that me doing that?_ **

You laughed gently and slowly kicked off your shoes into the floorboards. Sliding your slacks down.

Just leaving you in your underwear- you sent another picture.

**_The little lace one’s, is it? Delightful._ **

The next picture that was sent, he was still standing in front of the camera, his pants completely taken off and bundled up, held right in front of where his dick would be.

He was naked.

**_Move the pants?_ **

You typed back, a small greedy grin on your face as you slid off your panties and crawled into the back seat. There were still no movements anywhere around. And most likely wouldn’t be.

You both sent a picture at the same time, both posed at the best angel, him on the bed, you in the back seat with your legs spread.

_ Both Naked. _

**_I can see you’ve moved yours as well._ **

**_I did._ **

**_Are you sure I can’t fly over there, Love? I would hate for you to have to finger yourself while texting me._ **

You grinned wickedly as you slipped your free hand down, letting it gather some slick before you responded.

**_I think it’s a bit hot._ **

**_Oh it is, don’t get me wrong I love knowing you're naked in the back of a car at an abandoned warehouse._ **

You laughed lightly to yourself. Your finger finally brushing over your clit.

**_How about knowing I’m rubbing myself thinking of you?_ **

**_In all the right places?_ **

**_All of them._ **

You started slow, rubbing small circles as you waited for a reply.

**_Bloody Hell, Can I call you? Please? I need to hear your voice, Darling._ **

You hadn’t even given it a second glance as you dialed him, he answered almost immediately and his british voice sent a shiver through your legs.

“Are you wet?”

“Yes, Luci.”

“For me?”

“All yours, Luce.”

You heard his low groan and you pictured him stroking himself, his hand up and down as he laid spread out on the bed you two shared. The phone lazily pressed to his ear.

“All mine, Darling. Have you stuck a finger inside you?” He asked, earning a soft whine from your lips.

“No. My finger’s aren't as big as yours. Don’t feel like anything.” You muttered, you heard another groan as you rubbed faster. Almost as if he heard you-

“Don’t speed up, Stick two fingers in. You know how I do it, Love- nice and fast.” You nodded and shivered as you did what he said.

“Now sit up, ride them.” You sat up and bounced on your fingers, screwing your eyes shut.

“Oh. Oh. Oh.” You whimpered every time you were grounded.

You could hear his panting on the other end.

“Lucifer.”

“Y/n.”

“Oh Luci.”

“Tell me where you are, please, Need to be in you.”

You moaned into the phone and breathed out the location.

Seconds later as you kept rubbing, the phone went silent and the car door was opening.

You hadn’t even gotten a chance to panic before his hand was pulling your fingers out, laying you on your back-

_ Oh my god I’m going to die. _

His lips were sucking on your clit and the car door closed. 

“Lucifer. Oh my- oh please.” Before you could even think about what it was you wanted-

He was inside you, thrusting so fast the car was shaking and- oh this is definitely the best stake out you have ever had.

“Say my name, Darling. Louder. No one can hear you.” He muttered lowly while he bit into your neck and grabbed your hips, keeping you in place as his dick split you opened.

You screamed his name as he pistoned into you faster than should be humanly possible. Him grunting into your ear.


	5. Take A Trip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :( Real sad, angsty, self harm.
> 
> Lucifer leaves and you're left with the lies your mind has been telling you.

Sometimes you hated Lucifer’s job. And now it really clicked why.

He was gone. Lucifer hugged your waist and leaned down and whispered soft things in your ear and leaned down to lick the base of your throat, making you giggle and squirm in his arms.

And now- he was driving to another state with Ella and Chloe and your starting to wonder if he left because he knows.

You’re starting to wonder if he knows what you’ve been thinking, knows what you want to do. Maybe he saw you staring just a little bit too lovingly at the highway. As if you would walk in and disappear into a cloud of dust when a car hits you.

Maybe it was the hitch in your breath when you saw a gun or blade. Maybe it was the way you didn’t bother arguing with him anymore.

Maybe it was because he just didn’t want to deal with the changes.

You slightly remember how you were both wild crackers and open and  _ loud _ . And now he’s doing most of the talking for you both and he’s just so good at it that no one seems to notice it.

No one cares that you’ve been quiet- that you’ve been slowly eating away at yourself inside. You’re quite sure no one even knows.

How could Lucifer leave you when he was supposed to be the only one who knew- he was supposed to be there for you.

That’s why you hated his job. You hated how he still flirts his way through the doors and back out again. And you hate that you feel like you need to let him. 

And no matter how much you hated it- he was still in on the way to some state that you hadn’t bothered remembering. Chasing down a man. While he stops for food at the gas station with a grin and you stop at the bar in the penthouse and grab a whole bottle.

He often watched over what you drank, he knew that you were mortal and therefore you could overdose- you could over drink- you could die.

Shivers ran up your spine at the thought. Grabbing a glass and using a bottle opener to spin the cork out.

“Why would he care?” You muttered, fully aware no one else was around to hear it.

You hesitated for a moment before pursing your lips around the bottle, and leaning back.

_ Here goes nothing. _

You squinted as the heat rushed to your cheeks and you forced yourself not to pull back and have a coughing fit. Half the bottle was downed in the span of half an hour.

Lazily you checked your phone, he had only been gone 4 hours. And here you were- wallowing in self pity.

Did you really need him so bad? He’s probably off falling back in love with Chloe. You weren’t stupid. You could see it festering between the two of them when they thought you weren’t looking.

You sighed as you opened up the texts between him and you. You paused for a second at his, mostly ignoring your replies.

15 minutes passed before you had gotten to the top. In which you closed the app and re-opened it. You were back at the bottom.

You let out a scowl as you set the bottle on the counter to type with two hands.

**_Having fun?_ **

You don’t exactly know why that was what your fingers type, but the alcohol prohibited you any control. Maybe you shouldn’t be texting him.

**_I could never have fun without you, now could I?_ **

You rolled your eyes. Any other night you would have swooned at his feet, tonight you were sulking. Tonight you refused to be flirted with- he didn’t even like you.

**_Whatever you say._ **

You had typed ‘Watver’ thank god for autocorrect, though. You were also a bit shocked it hadn’t corrected it to ‘Wafer’.

You clicked off your phone and threw it beside you on the couch, staring down at the bottle.

He ran away because you were scaring him. He didn’t want to deal with someone like you- someone crazy.

You felt the goosebumps on your arm and before you could give it another glance over- you threw the 3/4ths drunken bottle at the glass window.

It shattered rather loudly and you stood up quickly, using your arms to cover yourself as the glass flew.

“He’s gonna be so mad.” You muttered, rushing forward to pick up some of the pieces. The third one sliced into your palm but you ignored it as you silently told yourself you had deserved it.

There was cuts and blood swirling on the floor- mixing with the contents of the bottle as you walked over to throw the pieces in the trash.

When you walked back- careful where you stepped, you picked up the biggest shard of glass, and slowly drug it across your forearm, watching in a drunken haze as beads of blood filled out one by one.

You hadn’t even seemed to react as it dripped into the blood and alcohol mix on the floor.

By the time they were cleaned up, you had cuts all up your soft skin and you had mostly dried up the bloody drink.

You didn’t seem to mind it as the blood on your hands continued to seep out and smear. It was only after it was all clean that you noticed the smears and smudges of blood on your shirt. You were broken beyond saving.

That’s why he left. That’s why you hated his job. That’s why you hated your life. And that’s why you hated yourself.

You turned and reopened your phone to quite a few texts and one call.

You slowly type back a reply, not bothering to read them.

**_Sorry I’m a bit tired. I dozed off._ **

Thank god for autocorrect.

You let the blood continue to drip down your arm as you laid on the leather couch.

He would never love you.

**_Are you sure, Love? I heard Maze say there was a loud noise upstairs. I told her not to check but I’m starting to think I should send her up. Are you decent?_ **

Your eyes were just the tiniest bit heavy and you were fully aware that if you didn’t sit up you would choke on your own vomit in your sleep.

**_I’m good. No need._ **

You sighed loudly and turned on your side. Staring into the three dots as you know he typed.

**_Alright. I’ll be back soon, Darling._ **

You only scoffed and closed your phone.

How could someone like him love someone like you?

Your eyes were just about to close when you heard the elevator ding and running. A low growl, followed by pressure and pain.

Your eyes forced themselves open and you watched as Maze- the seemingly stoic warrior- stumbled with the buttons of her phone.

“Lucifer.” She growled lowly. You heard the phone click and she tossed it on the table.

“Yes? Did you check on her?” You wanted to squint at how loud it was. Did it really have to be on speaker? You watched as if you weren’t in your body when he dug her nails in your wound, most likely trying to apply pressure.

“She  _ lied.”  _ The other end went silent when she said that and you were only slightly aware that she was on her knees, in front of the couch.

It seemed like minutes before you heard his voice. You looked up slightly and saw him just as he was folding his wings back in.

“Oh, Love. What did you do?” It was pitiful at how weak he sounded but your eyes were forcing themselves shut.

Not that you had even had the strength to pay attention to anything since you’d laid down.

“Call an ambulance, Maze.”

“They’ll put her in one of those crazy places, like they did you!”

“Even if they do, she needs an ambulance.”

“And before you even think about it- No. Alcohol and tissues will not work for mortals.” You barely registered Maze mumble something about how much easier it would be in reply.

And then your ears finally closed up. And you were left to the darkness.

(}{)

He glanced at Chloe when you weren’t looking, exchanging worried glances for you as the smile from your lips became duller and duller. He pulled her aside and asked her if she saw the same he had. He looked at you nervously whenever you strayed too far away.

You thought he was in love with her. You caught all the little side glances and working a bit too close. You caught the nervous look at you when you were nearby. The disappearing and shoulder touches. The whispering.

  
  
  


When the woman said he wasn’t allowed beyond this point he turned to you and grinned at the woman. He told her about how he needed just four minutes alone, that this was the place he wanted to propose to you at- that he was so madly in love with you. Whispering it as if it was to keep it from you.

You thought he was flirting with her to get through. The wicked smiles, the glancing at you, the slight glint in his eyes. The enthusiasm in him. How he always insists you stay a bit away when he does it. The whispers and the side glances. Sometimes they would even straighten his suit and he would thank them.

  
  
  
  


He would always count and measure how much you drank, making sure you were sane enough to know what you said, to make sure you were healthy. That you didn’t drink like he did. That you wouldn’t be as screwed up as he was.

You thought he was cutting you off so you didn’t drink his. expensive wines. Maybe even so you wouldn’t die and he would be blamed. So he didn’t have to deal with your death. So he wouldn’t have to feel guilty.

  
  
  
  
  


It’s a funny thing what your mind can tell you.


End file.
